been awhile......

few weeks ago i was in missouri taking stuff home. i ended up meeting a female when i was up town. newbie to the place. had to bust her intrest of the town with there is nuttin to do there. she was from another town in missouri. and went to school with someone i loved and with for the longest time and a few of her friends. yup if your guessing the person she knew was genesis your rite. we talked for awhile and then we went to her grandmother house, where she moved to. lol she pulled out her old year book. take a guess who i wanted to see first. yup genesis! she mite be mad at me for doin it but oh well. i thought her school picture was cute and i like the cheerleader outfit on her. ;p we started talking about her and everyone she hung out with. pretty funny stuff i was told. loud, out goin, always doin crazy stuff, and hair of many colours. most things she told me was shocking b/c i was thinking in the back of my mind are we talking about the same person here? seemed almost like it. the girl she was telling me about didn't seem to be the same girl i was with. suprising she even knew me. well not really but you can get what i meant. she told me gen talked alot about me. just about always mentioning my name. she thought would she ever one day actually meet me. since gen talked about me so much. funny, how it is a small world. ne wayz she ended up asking me if me and her was still together. i wanted to lie and say yes we are, but i couldn't so i said the truth and told her no. she asked why and i told her. also mention how stupid i was for doing it. it hurt me alot. wanted to cry. everything she told me about her and her friends and things she did. made me think why could she not just tell me everything. end up finding everything about her from someone else that knew her and hung out with her a few times. what so hard with opening up to someone you absolutly love the most? i still love you alot gen. wish we could be together. but ne wayz i need to get back to what i was talking about b4 it hits me even more and actually make sure i die. it was weird for me that whole 4th of july weekend. i really felt so lost confused and empty. made me think alot too. oh by the way nice high school picture sara, lol, loved the hair. but ne wayz me and amy hung out all weekend. she is a cool person. funny though. ne wayz i gotta go for now. time get back to sleep. lataz!



P.S. Will forever and always love you gen, together or not, my love for you will never die and if it should, it will happen when i die, but fear not it will be with me forever in the after life...